What is Cheating?

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Do you believe in love? Is it possible to love more than one person? Is loving more than one person wrong?

Clearly, my questions are directed towards couples. I have been collecting information about relationships for quite some time now and what I have come to conclude about this topic can be quite disheartening. My knowledge comes from facts interpreted into my opinions; so it is truly up to you to choose whether to believe me or not.

There are relationships that last weeks, months, and/or years. What makes a relationship last depends on how well the couple works together. The better the communication and understanding of one another, the better they accommodate each other and the more enduring the relationship becomes. Attraction also has a big factor in how long a relationship lasts; the more attractive you find your partner, the more affectionate you tend to be.

If you are in a relationship where you have all the qualities your partner wants in a person and your partner has all the qualities you want in a person and you both have been together for quite sometime, would you consider cheating on your partner with someone else? Your answer might be ‘no’ at the moment but after what I’m about to tell you, you just might change the way you see things.

Unfortunately, being human, as perfect as we want to be, is what makes us imperfect. We are made so that we can love more than one person. Our emotions can expand to an unlimited amount meaning we can love and hate numerous people. Who made the rule for us to only love one person? Who said loving more than one person is “cheating”? Was it society? The Bible? I don’t know, but what I do know is that as much as you want to trust your partner to not cheat on you, it is still possible that he/she will.

Why would someone who loves you and to whom you seem perfect cheat on you? Because we have a kryptonite called attraction. To put it into perspective, I’m going to give you a scenario: A couple has been dating for years. He loves her and she loves him. She meets a cute guy at work but nothing crosses her mind. She sees him again and she smiles at him because she remembers him and wants to be polite and he does the same. She sees him again and this time he says “Hi,” and she replies with “Hi.” The next time she sees him, he starts a friendly conversation but nothing flirty. At this point, keep in mind that she still loves her boyfriend and has no intention of cheating on him, but she does find this guy attractive. So this guy adds her on Facebook and they have more friendly conversations. While they converse, she starts to get to know him better and he is somewhat the type of guy she likes as well. He gets her number, he flirts a little, she smiles back. What is happening here is that she is developing feelings for him. It may not be feelings that may lead to cheating but she definitely likes him as a person enough to keep him around even though he is flirting a little. Now to skip ahead; the more they talked the more they liked each other. They found out they have a lot in common and they have become closer. At this point, she has a crush on the guy while in a relationship. Even though she may be strictly against cheating on her boyfriend, it is still a possibility. Now, what happens next depends on how the boyfriend is behaving. If he is still being affectionate, and satisfies all her needs, she most likely will not cheat. But as soon as the boyfriend starts being a jerk, and starts arguments, she starts to lean closer towards cheating. It’s only a matter of time until she does.

It is not her fault. It does not make her evil or a “cheater.” She is just doing what her heart feels. We as humans tend to follow our hearts over what we think is the right thing to do. As bad as the situation may seem, if the action makes you feel right, you will proceed. My advice to the men and women reading this is that if you don’t want your partner to cheat on you, you will have to be at the top of your game at all times. Never get too comfortable and think that it will never happen to you because once you start slipping, that’s when the other person comes and takes it from you. Again, this is from my knowledge and my opinion. I wouldn’t tell you something I don’t strongly believe. What you decide to do now is all up to you.

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